WHERE TO FIND RESPECT?

“बिन मांगे मोती मिले, मांगे मिले न भीख”

Why did you say that to me? Why was I not invited? I got to know through others what you said? My words were unheard by them? I wasn’t given credit, why?

With such several situations our respect is shattered into pieces many times. In the name of respect, we are either pressurising others, or compelling ourselves to do or act in a way that results into sometimes unpleasantness, or sometimes pleasant experiences. 

      It is interesting that we want respect all the time and from every other person, especially those near and dear.

Otherwise we feel lost and sorrowful in ourselves, known only to ourselves, our four walled room, and our pillow (wet with tears).

      How long are we going to keep asking for respect?

And is there any end or satisfaction in borrowed or begged feelings or things?

     To come out of this vicious circle one would need to go deeper into the meaning of respect. ‘Knowing the worthfulness of oneself, knowing one’s strengths, knowing ones’ weaknesses, knowing human potential is the beginning to understanding self-respect .

The moment we are able to see our own value in our own eyes, ‘Yes, I am a unique individual with immense possibilities’, I start building and improving upon my talents, & skills not because I want to prove to the world, but to know the possibilities within me! Similarly being aware of my lifestyle, diet, and my thought processes and an alignment in it is also part of self-respect. Bringing balance and self control in ones’ behaviour is now a self inspired process, rather than strings pulling or pushing one like a puppet in a direction of impulse. This inner journey of self respect brings naturally “earned respect” in our interactions with people, and situations.

  Those who are in this journey of delving deep into ‘self respect’ naturally appreciate people around them and appreciated as well. Those who are still to begin this journey swing between ‘I am respected or not respected’ and are still caught by external pressures.

In the words of Mahatma Gandhi ji, “Self respect & Honour cannot be protected by others. They are for each individual himself or herself to guard.”

Authored by Ms Shaalu Agrawal (Educationist, Mental Health Coach)
Coauthored by Vaidya Shefali Sangal (Ayurvedic physician, Counsellor, Healor)
( Together they are team of Kaivalya Counselling).
21st Sept,2021